Back Up. Back Away.

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I gained 12 pounds in the last 9 months. Not an admission many personal trainers are willing to make. And I could give you reasons like crazy: depression, loss of a beloved pet, winter, health. None of the reasons are important when it comes down to the grit of looking at the scale climb by more than a pound every month. What becomes important is how I deal with the weight gain. Uh, spoiler alert: not well.

I went through all the mental knocking myself on the head with a bat that you might do. A heaping helping of self-negation topped off with a sneer every time I put on my “fat jeans.” Recognize that? For one reason or another–if not weight, then aging or losing a job or not winning the grand prize in the state fair pickling contest–almost everyone gets there sometime. So what do we do when we recognize the evil stepmother in the mirror telling us we sure as hell aren’t the fairest of them all?

Back up, back away. For me that meant stepping off the scale. I know far too much about nutrition to dive into a crazy diet and, frankly, all those reasons that led me here haven’t disappeared. So, I backed up, backed away, turned myself away from the mirror and listened to my poor body that just wanted some reassurance that I wasn’t going to do anything crazy. Didn’t crawl into bed and not move but didn’t punish myself with 100 burpees a day either. No muumuus but no lycra. Ate that biscuit that my body and mind thought would really be the most soothing thing on a cold winter morning. But didn’t eat three.

Problem solved? Of course not. That will take time. And effort. And I’ll work my way there a little at a time.

Whatever has us feeling like crud, a little compassion for ourselves can only help. There’s always a way to back up. Just takes giving ourselves the same slack we extend so much more readily to others.

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